Running this blog for the past year or so has been interesting to say the least. It has brought me a lot of joy – and pain – and I have grown in many different ways. Through this experience I have also been lucky to meet some amazingly intelligent and articulate people that I now like to call friends. It has been a wild ride!
I have found a great deal of joy in learning new things and expanding and stretching my beliefs, but sometimes that stretching is painful. And sometimes pain comes from letting go of certain beliefs. But I think the greatest pain, unfortunately, comes from friends who view me as unfaithful, damaging, or heading toward apostasy because of my questions or posts. I have had friends “unfriend” me on facebook, warn me of falling away, and call me to some kind of repentance. Now, I don’t mind a good discussion at all, but there is a difference between discussions and personal attacks. I’m not saying this to get sympathy points, but these are just some of the things that my brothers and I have come up against while running this blog.
I have been asked many times why I question. Why do I kick against the pricks? Why do I rock the boat? Is my blog anti-Mormon? Why don’t I defend the Church better or at all? Why do I choose to run this blog? Although it is very public, I write to better articulate my own struggles and thoughts and beliefs. For each post I publish I have to meticulously write out each argument backed with hours of research. Often a post requires two or more months of researching, writing, thinking, re-writing, and more re-writing (not to mention the hours my editor/wife donates to this project). But it truly helps me work out my faith and beliefs.
If we don’t ask questions, we don’t get answers, plain and simple. My memory might be a little foggy, but I remember something about a 14-year-old boy who read some scripture in James about lacking wisdom and asking questions. Anyone recall that kid? Joe something?? And there is another scripture, something about knocking and getting an answer. Throughout our history and throughout our scriptures we have invitations to ask, to knock, to search. We teach our children songs about it (Search, Ponder and Pray!). We also have countless people in our Mormon history who have asked, knocked, and searched. So why do I ask? Well, because the invitation is there. Asking questions is in our Mormon tradition and our Mormon DNA. It would just be strange not to seek truth after so many examples and invitations in the scriptures. Can you imagine a scripture that said, “Ssshhh, says the Lord of hosts, don’t worry about those things.” Just doesn’t seem right, does it? Wise words from my good friend Jared Anderson: Challenge the scriptures and let them challenge you. In all honesty, sometimes instead of finding answers I find more questions. But through the search I sure learn a whole lot about Mormonism and about myself. “Dude, it’s about the journey man” (said in your best hippy voice).
This is my crew – My wonderful wife/editor of my random thoughts and my 4 boys
Another important reason I search and push the envelope is because I have children. I want to be able to thoughtfully and honestly answer any questions my children have. If I don’t have the answers, I want to help them in their personal searches. I want them to be able to feel comfortable asking me questions. Have you ever thought of how you would answer your child if he asked about polygamy? (Just a heads up, polygamy wasn’t the result of a shortage of men on the pioneer trail.) I want my kids to ask questions. I want them to seek truth and find truth wherever it may lie. That to me is pure Mormonism.
One of the many rewards that comes from running the blog is being able to connect with other people. I’m always very surprised when I find out who reads our blog and am even more surprised when they like it! I love knowing that I have friends who share the same questions and struggles. Sometimes people hesitate to voice their questions and concerns because they are afraid of being shunned or minimalized. Because of our blog, people are more willing to confide in me; I have become approachable to friends who are struggling or have questions. And I have reconnected with a lot of old friends because of the blog and it warms my heart. I am very, very thankful for that. You are okay in my book if you have questions or doubts – let’s hash it out together. It is always nice to have the support of friends on this journey.
“…Friendship is the grand fundamental principle of Mormonism, to revolutionize and civilize the world – pour forth love…” Joseph Smith 23 July 1843 (Sunday Afternoon) in Andrew Ehat and Lyndon Cook, The Words of Joseph Smith, pg. 234
I hope our readers find things of value on this blog. And it is definitely not required to agree with everything that is put forth. Sometimes when our belief traditions are challenged it can get a little uncomfortable. If you ever feel uncomfortable, ask yourself why. Is the discomfort causing more questions? Is it because what is being conveyed is untrue? It is important to challenge ideas when you have strong feelings and opinions yourself. By doing so, we can learn from and understand each other.
I will end with the words of someone who is held in high regard in our little world of Mormonism: “Methodists have creeds which a man must believe or be asked out of their church. I want the liberty of thinking and believing as I please.” The first reader who correctly guesses the author of this quote in the comments below (without using Google) gets a cool RationalFaiths sticker. Good luck!
Pablo
Born and raised in Northern California, Pablo received his education at Ricks College and BYU with a BA in Spanish, minor in PE Coaching. Pablo served his LDS mission during the years 94-96 in Rosario, Argentina. He now runs a skate shop and batting cages in Orem, UT. He's married and has 4 boys.
All posts by Pablo
Joseph Smith said that.
Sticker please.
Leah money! I should have said permabloggers get a free sticker anyways! FB me your address!
Paul,
I’ve been looking for that quote for my post on Friday. What is the source dude?
Great post, by the way, little brother.
Oh, in that case I’ll get you my address soon. 😉
1st, I agree that it is important that we can ask questions and seek answers. It’s dangerous if/when we are ever told not to ask such questions and to simply accept things as they are. That mentality will give outsiders the idea that we don’t think for ourselves and aren’t free to ask questions. But the truth is that some things we can’t/won’t have answers for, and have to accept by faith for now.
There are things you write about and believe that I disagree with. It’s important that you/we not be disagreeable even when we disagree. When we disagree, sometimes I hear “the science says this” or “the science says that”. I’m reminded of scientists, who disagree even among themselves such things as man made global warming or creationism vs evolution. The point is that science is what you want it to be. At the end of the day, you conclude whatever you will based upon your own research, evidence, and background. Others will do the same and you may ultimately disagree (as you and I have in the past). We should be understanding and respectful toward others who disagree with us, as you certainly are.
Keep up the good work Pablo.
Amen to the respect. And yes we will agree to disagree.
Can’t help but add Henry Eyring to the mix:
The significant thing about a scientist is this: he simply expects the truth to prevail because it is the truth. He doesn’t work very much on the reactions of his heart. In science, the thing is, and its being so is something one cannot resent. If a thing is wrong, nothing can save it, and if it is right, it cannot help succeeding.
So it is with the gospel. I once had the privilege of attending a youth conference and responding to questions of the assembled young people. A young man asked “In high school we are taught such things as pre-Adamic men, bet we hear another thing in Church. What should I do about it?”
I think I gave the right answer. I said “In this Church, you only have to believe the truth. Find out what the truth is!”
-from Reflections of a Scientist
Love this post, Paul. And love the blog too. I am excited and invigorated to know not only is it ‘okay’ to ask questions, but it’s actually encouraged. Thanks for the hard work. Keep it up!
I love this post. It’s hard to be a member that has a natural born instinct to “dig a little deeper” before finding peace in questions/teachings others just naturally accept. Honestly, if I had it my way, I would change that about myself. Life would be so much easier if I had the ability like my husband does, to simply accept what is asked of us and taught in the church without question. I’m envious of those that can do that. In my personal experience, being one who questions isn’t easy or fun. I appreciate your blog very much. It’s nice to know others sometimes have to “dig deeper” like me. 🙂 PS. Cute Kiddos!
Jason,
You know, Jason, if you want to point out examples of scientifically controversial topics, you should really pick something better than human-caused climate change and evolution. Those are two areas where there is an overwhelming scientific consensus. The only controversy there is with people who don’t understand the science not liking what the scientists say. Next time, go with something like string theory. That’s legitimately controversial.
I’m not sure what “evidence” you are referring to? Perhaps it’s the record cold temperatures we’ve seen this summer.
http://www.climatedepot.com/2013/08/21/2899-record-cold-temps-vs-667-record-warm-temps-in-u-s/
Perhaps it’s the climate theories that continue to crumble every year.
http://www.thenewamerican.com/tech/environment/item/16372-climate-theories-crumble-as-data-and-experts-suggest-global-cooling
I guess you’re referring to to evidence of “global warming” which was confirmed recently as being fabricated. Flat earth global warning supporters now change there vernacular to “climate change” instead of “global warming” because the fact is the earth isn’t cooling as they have been preaching for years and years. Calling it “climate change” allows them to always say “I told you so” when the earth is warmer or cooler. The “science” of man made climate change is a joke and not at all agreed upon.
As for evolution, I believe the bible. I can’t speak much of the “science” except to say I believe the bible.
Would it help to know that president David O’Mckay believed in evolution? How about every science teacher that works at BYU?
Just to be clear, I believe in evolution in that we all evolve over time. I think you can believe in both creationism and evolution. I believe you believe in the creation as told in Genesis, right? Could there have been evolution that followed that? Of course. Just look at how much bigger and stronger we are today compared to just 30-50 years ago. What I don’t believe in is the accidental, and purely coincidental explosion that created our world we live in today.
Good points though Paul.
And as for global warming. The earth warms, and then cools, and then warms, and then cools. It goes in cycles and is largely not caused by man at all. Perhaps infinitesimally man made but primarily it is the pattern that it has always followed.
President Joseph Fielding Smith said that man would never go to the moon. Sometimes a prophet is wrong when he discusses things that are simply his opinion.
I think you made this point on another blog post once.
Dude, you rock! Keep doin’ what you’re doin’…
Paul,
You and I will many times not agree on a lot of issues, but I admire your desire to learn, to many saints just sit back and care not to learn and grow. May God bless and guide us in all our journies.
Go Barkers!
One year of awesomeness: check!
I love this blog and your posts. They are both thoughtful and thought-provoking. I read a lot of blogs (regularly skipping through the bloggernacle, as it were), but this has to be my favorite. In particular I’ve been impressed on more than one occasion by the attitude of deep respect the Barker brothers work to instill here in their responses towards the menagerie of opinions expressed. That and the friendly banter. It’s good stuff. Keep up the good work.
I agree with your comments. The blog wouldn’t really be that fun if we all agreed with each other. The Barkers respect those who disagree with them, and allow opposing points of view.
I have found myself actually coming around and agreeing with something I previously would have disagreed with them on after reading their thoughtful and well researched post.
While I do not blog (much at least), this post resonated so deeply in terms of why I am a seeker; why I question, why I think about things (too much and/or too deeply some people have told me). For me, the natural response to “why do you ask these questions?” is “how could I not?”
Your part about having children similarly, though it includes parents, siblings, friends, fellow-saints and anyone else. I expect people to have questions. I want to be ready, if not to answer them (indeed, I’ve learned often not to answer), but to support them in their own questioning and searching for truth.
Well said Leonard! Thank you for reading my post.
Well done, Paul. Thanks for writing this.
Also, I have never, ever, in my life, applied a bumper sticker to any car I have owned. Ever. Until now. The fish with “Mormon” in the middle delights me no end.
Also, my faith is far more emotional and intuitional than rational. Spirit speaks to me in metaphor and wonder, more often than in science and reason. (Although I can make a reasonable argument for the place of science in faith.) I’m glad there is room for artists at this table. I thoroughly enjoy contributing.
Now, let’s talk about your church attendance. 😉