I was on my mission when we all heard the announcement that young men and women would be able to begin their missions earlier. Grins and cheers went around the room, but I wasn’t among those grinning. While I was surprised and excited by the announcement I couldn’t help but wonder if the Church was truly ready for this change.
1.5% of missionaries come home early for health- related issues per year. If that doesn’t sound like a lot, remember that the number of missionaries currently serving is around 74,900. That number is expected to peak around 95,000 over the next couple of years. That means over 1100 come home every year, and that number will increase to over 1400 each year. As the attention of mission presidents and doctors is spread thinner, I expect the rate to increase. With the lower age requirements, we can also expect higher instances of emotional and mental illness from those unprepared for missionary service.
Missions can be more complicated than our enthusiastic youth think. My mission was a trying time of my life. I knew beforehand that it would be hard, but I thought the challenges would be different. I always heard stories about pastors yelling at us in the street, dog attacks, weird food, and it sounded like a challenging fun adventure. While I did experience all of that and more, I never expected the health problems that I developed.
While in the field, a strange clicking sound started in my spine. At first I tried my best to ignore it. When my torso began to droop to the right and twist it became impossible. Walking was difficult; something that is really hard not to do in Brazil.
I dealt with this problem for over a year of my mission. I was frustrated by what I feel was inadequate treatment. While I had contact with our “mission doctor”, I was not receiving the treatment that I needed to be happy and successful. The mission doctor did his check ups and prescriptions by phone. He was oddly unfazed by the report that my body was twisting. Literally hundreds of Elders and Sisters called him with their health issues, he was responsible for half the Brazilian missions.
Eventually I couldn’t leave my bed for more than 10 minutes without shaking in pain and realized that I needed to visit a doctor who could examine my spine more thoroughly no matter what the phone doctor said.
A quick doctor’s visit and physical therapy were well within my mission’s grasp. However, I received none of this treatment. I was told that I should pray with more faith and fast with more purpose. Rest less and work harder. I would faithfully follow my doctor’s and president’s orders each time but after a few days without rest I always would inevitably collapse. It was made very clear to me by the Mission President that I was to blame because I had not truly confessed and forsaken my sins. If I could do this and overcome my “laziness” my problem would go away.
I still remember the scripture my Missionary President cited to justify my ailment.
D&C 88:67 – And if your eye be single to my glory, your whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in you; and that body which is filled with light comprehendeth all things.
“So why isn’t your eye single to the lord’s glory?” he asked me, “when this happens, your body will be filled with light and you will be healed.” When I responded that I was working as hard as I physically could he told me to work harder and start fasting and I would be healed. He accused me of lying and my request for an X-ray and treatment was denied. I felt bullied, unworthy, and still had no idea what was happening to my twisted body.
I was denied real medical treatment until the end of my mission and am still recovering one year later. I feel extremely blessed that I was able to finish my mission and continue helping people until the end. I believe missions can be really great experiences. However, my experience, and others like it, are reminders that we can do much better at handling missionaries with health issues.
As I’ve shared my experience with others I’ve learned how common similar issues are.
Many have had problematic treatment for mental illnesses. It’s common for missionaries to only be prescribed an anti-depressant or similar drug and left alone. Medication helps, but in most cases further help is needed. Counseling, therapy, and changes in lifestyle are not always available or easily obtainable options for missionaries suffering from depression, anxiety, and other mental illnesses.
Many who come home early face harsh judgment and are pressured to get better quickly so they can finish their missions, often at the expense of proper recovery.
BYU has an interview system in place to make sure that missionaries who came home early “weren’t faking it” before being allowed back to study. One man who came home early after nearly dying from Lyme disease left his second interview in tears. His father, a BYU professor, had to come with him to the third interview to show BYU that his son was not faking his deadly illness.
Our mission presidents and their wives are human. I wish we didn’t place so much responsibility for our missionaries’ health on their untrained judgment. I believe that inspiration goes only as far as our knowledge allows. Most mission presidents and their wives are not medically trained; they shouldn’t have to make medical decisions.
Our missionaries are human as well, and less experienced. I wish they were always taken care of. They sacrifice more than enough to deserve decent health care. I wish they weren’t made to feel unworthy or weak for their reactions to stress, foreign diets and environments, and an extremely demanding schedule. No one says a mission is easy, but for those who get sick or injured it can become difficult in a very frightening way.
The current system is inadequate. We need better training and more open conversation about this problem. As more and more young men and women answer the call to serve at younger ages, we will see more and more come home early or suffer handicapped with serious health issues.
With the help of others we are creating a plan to help improve the quality of missionaries’ health. We have created a website for people to share their stories. We’ve created a survey for returned missionaries about their experiences that will be presented to the Church Mission Department. We aim to raise awareness about the imperfect system of treating missionaries with health issues, both through regular members and through direct contact with church leadership. Some specific long-term goals for this project include:
– Provide an online resource for missionaries and families of missionaries to share their experiences dealing with health issues openly. Build a community to support them.
– Collect stories for a meeting with the Church Mission department.
– Decrease the number of injured or sick returned missionaries who become disaffected from the church due to misunderstandings with leaders and members.
– Provide better health-related training for the mission president and his wife in the MTC and during their missions.
– Call for an increased number of mission doctors. They are overworked.
– Provide better training for local ward and stake leaders for supporting missionaries who have had serious health issues.
– More pre-mission screening and treatment of physical and mental health issues.
To learn more about this project please visit www.purpleheartrms.com. If you experienced mild to severe health issues on your mission please take our 10-minute survey or submit your story to us. Also, consider sharing this information with people you know who may have an interest in this project by liking and sharing our Facebook page (Purple Heart RMs).
You can also email us directly with stories, questions, or anything else at drewbotcherby@gmail.com and ryanfreeshot@gmail.com.
Drew Botcherby
When Drew isn’t digging through the jeans at the D.I. he’s trying to get into the BYU Advertising program. Born in Los Angeles, raised in El Paso, he now calls Springville, Utah home. He served a mission in Recife, Brazil. His dream is to own a VW camper van and live in it.
All posts by Drew Botcherby
Purple Heart RMs has an important meeting with a prominent emeritus General Authority at the end of the month. We would like to have some preliminary survey results to use in that meeting. Please consider taking our survey.
That sort of thing should not be occurring. I know of an LDS doctor here who was called for 18 months to serve in SLC on a new medical advisory committee that works with missionaries throughout the world.
Fortunately I never had any medical issues on my 2 year mission but I can’t imagine my mission president denying me proper medical attention. I guess I thought that those who truly need it are able to access it.
Good luck in your future health. I hope you are better now.
What a harrowing story. I have never, when my children were in any distress, gone to the scriptures first to find a sin! Holy mackerel. Why would our missions be run this way?
I’m seriously staggered by the mission president’s treatment of the issue.
The biggest takeaway from this article was that some mission presidents are fools and a danger to the missionaries they preside over.
I have heard so many stories like this one. Accusing the sick person of sin, seems to be the standard of care for LDS missionaries
Do you want survey results from people who didn’t really have health problems on their missions?
Dave, this survey is for missionaries who had mild, moderate, or severe mental or physical health issues.
I would like to eventually see a survey that is more in depth about missionary experience. I think that would be interesting and useful, but we are looking at a specific issue right now.
I have a son on a mission right now and this story sends chills down my spine. Did your parents know what was going on? Were you honest with them about the challenges you were facing? If I was your parent and I understood the nature of your pain I would have personally flown down to Brazil and dragged your sick ass home. Spine problems are serious business.
I wasn’t very open about it. Maybe I was scared of disappointing them? Looking back I don’t know why.
I know a man who did exactly that when his son nearly went into a coma. He flew out to Canada to personally take his son to a proper hospital where they diagnosed him with Lyme disease and maybe saved his life.
Great post! What a worthy project! I took your survey. I hope you’re able to bring about the changes you’re pushing for.
Hi Drew, I also had some medical issues while on my mission, I found the complete opposite in regards to how the church dealt with it. The purpose of the mission doctor on my mission was to advise me and the mission president where I should turn to get help, I had back issues and later depression. My back issue was treated by local Physio Therapists and then with recommendation to use a gym every few days to help build strength in my back. The church paid for everything and were more than accommodating. This all helped me get better. In regards to my depression I was never blamed, my mission president lovingly allowed me to come home to get better, once home he believed it would be best to stay home. Im very lucky to of had my mission president, I do understand that you didnt have the same experience. I feel its important that others know the church does handle medical matters seriously and extremely well, unfortunately in your case not so well.
Hey Richard, we are glad that your situation was handled so well. If you have the time consider sending your story to us at purpleheartrms@gmail.com. We are looking for positive and negative experiences. The positive ones can serve as a model and also give credit where credit is due.
Trying to spread the word in europe.
I think you’re doing something very important.
I also think this is a very important point.During my mission, I had a very small problem compared to this story, just twisted my anckle, but pretty badly;the mission doctor that I called on the phone just told me to wait for a few days, which did not help at all…I didn’t have anything to heal, no médicine, not even something to hold my foot.I called him three times until he finally decided to take his car and come to see what was needed to be done.I really had the feeling I was a problem for him and that it was not usual for him to make a real visit if needed.This just left me a very bad impression of how missionnaries are taking care of with mission doctors.Hopefully, my mission president was an extraordinary man and did everything he could to help me because at that time my mother had a cancer(of which she died during that time).He guided me to see a psychologist during my mission.And it was really really important at that time.I didn’t have to ask him anything, he felt that I needed help and support at that time and has been like a father to me.Just to show the difference between the two.And don’t misunderstand me, the doctor was a good man, but not a good doctor!
This makes me so happy that you are doing this. I have heard so many stories.
Thanks to everyone for the support. If you liked the post then you should hop on over and like our facebook page 🙂
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Purple-Heart-RMs/188435787971809
Our son had significant medical issues on his mission from a brutal attack on he and his companion. He couldn’t have been treated better by the church and by his MP.
I’m sorry yours was a bad experience and frankly mission service is fraught with danger, as is life. I felt that your story was however, very one sided.
From my experience the church went out of their way to do everything possible to take care of our son and there was absolutely never any “you just don’t have enough faith” talk! So please don’t make it sound like that’s the norm.
I myself never had any health issues on my mission, but I do understand uncaring/wackadoo mission presidents. I’m sorry you had a bad egg. 🙁
My father is a mission president in the US, and his missionaries have access to some of the best hospitals in the nation, LDS specialists who bend over backwards to help missionaries, and a senior missionary dedicated to managing missionary medical concerns. This is 100% more than was available to my mission in Europe. I think medical care is excellent in some missions, and in others it is almost nonexistent. I had two companions diagnosed with depression and given meds after only one consult with the area doctor. Having watched a sibling adjust to psychiatric drugs, I knew it could take months or years of careful monitoring to find the appropriate type and amount of drug. I thought my companions’ mental health needs weren’t managed very appropriately.
Good luck to you all!
I had serious health issues on my mission and ended up having to have emergency surgery–
everything was handled very well–
however, now, looking back, I realize that stress exacerbated the problem. There were some heavy problems in our mission; I was one of the lucky ones who got to stay out in the field–
I was well treated, but I wonder if there is anything that can be done to make missions less like boot camps and more like–
something better than boot camp–
so many missionaries went home from my mission; I served long ago and far away, though–
many things have changed; nobody ever told me that if I had faith I wouldn’t be sick, but then my illness was very obvious.
I think the biggest problem is that people don’t dare criticize the church without being told they are apostates–
everyone must be insanely cheerful and positive about the church all the time; THAT is unhealthy–
For what it’s worth (and I don’t want to pretend it’s a whole lot), I had a very different experience. I had a mission president who was so eager to recommend prescriptions and doctor’s visits that you had to fight him off once he thought you were sick.
As a diabetic, I was encouraged to not just take my usual insulin, but to see a doctor about any other health concerns that might creep up. I was encouraged to talk to a dietician. I got a referral to see a foot doctor, despite having no problems whatsoever. As missionaries we joked about the fact that it was good that we were missionaries, because anyone else who was getting prescribed vicodin so easily would probably be selling it.
My companions had different health concerns over the time I was serving, such as a torn shoulder, othodontic surgery teeth issues, and a time when both my companion and I went to a clinic for severe dehydration/food poisoning. Every time we were taken care of, to the point that we questioned whether or not we were… really… working hard enough, if that makes any sense.
This was all stateside, so I’m sure that plays a part – my sister had similar rough experiences in Brazil. She needed simple orthodic inserts for her shoes, but was sent home because she reported numbness in her legs. (She was quickly reassigned and sent out again after seeing a doc and getting inserts in the States so… the Church wasted the cost of the flights, but that’s about it.)
My point is – the Church obviously isn’t unprepared to deal with health concerns – it just needs to be open to hearing about the problems that are happening and putting new measures in place. Sorry that you had to deal with having your worthiness questioned etc., especially during a time when that’s so important to you as a missionary. I’ve never heard stories this ridiculous before, and I hope it stays an oddity.
This is wonderful!
I’d just like to throw out there that if anyone out there considers that they are struggling with obsessions of being absolutely perfect, pure, and ideal and/or with repetitious religiously dark thoughts (to the point where it’s seriously degrading your life day in and day out), that there’s no reason to suffer through it alone. There’s NO shame in having these thoughts. There is a strong field of psychiatry dedicated to those who have religiously intense OCD and getting treatment/therapy for it is no different than getting treatment for any other illness.
As someone who’s been there: it’s worth it to speak up, nothing I’ve done before or since has had a greater impact on my ability to find peace with the world. It’s hard, but it’s worth it.
The facebook page wasn’t showing up in some peoples’ search feeds. The link is: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Purple-Heart-RMs/188435787971809
or
https://www.facebook.com/purpleheartrms
🙂
This same exact thing happened to my husband when he served in Mexico. He was deathly ill and the mission doctor would only give him aspirin and tell him to get back to work. It wasn’t until he nearly collapsed at an investigator’s house that that investigator forced him to a different doctor to get the treatment he needed. It’s certainly been a sore spot for him towards the church and it makes him apprehensive to send our own kids and his little brothers on missions. It also doesn’t portray our church very well to investigators. We need to take better care of our missionaries.
I’m sorry you suffered pain during your mission. May I ask? Did you tell anyone else about this in your mission? I don’t believe highly intelligent Mission President’s who are former doctors and millionaire business owners would show such ignorance. I have trouble believing your entire story. By your “goals” of wanting to live in an RV trailer lol there are other issues here, clearly. . Perhaps depression? That is connected with pain and both are very real. Focus on the positive parts of your mission. You look like a good kid. Forgive your MP for any perceived wrongs. Perception doesn’t always equal reality.