Before we introduce Conference Pong, a bit of news for you twitter peeps – RationalFaiths will be live tweeting General Conference this weekend. So if you are on Twitter follow us, here is our twitter handle @rationalfaiths.
Conference Bingo is old and tired. It’s time for a new game and this time I’ve combined trivia and a college drinking game (but there will be no drinking as I am WoW observant). It’s time for
There are three levels of game play; Celestial, Terrestrial, and Telestial. There are four sessions of conference (five if you’re not a lady), so you can use one session for warmup and ramp up your play with each session.
To play, you will need:
Ping Pong balls labeled with topics such as: First Vision, Prayer, Heavenly Father, Scriptures, Word of Wisdom, Baptism, Joseph Smith, Motherhood, Jesus Christ, Children, Music, Resurrection, Love, Family, Family History, Priesthood, Missionary Work, Faith, Pioneers, Prophets, Temples, Scriptures, Marriage, Repentance, Atonement, Sustaining Leaders, Second Coming, Tithing, Children
30 cups (If you are feeling particularly Celestial, you might want to use Mason jars. Everyone knows those are the Celestial vessel for liquids.)
You need to label the cups and fill them with the corresponding item as follows (make one set for each team):
Cup 1: Thomas S. Monson
When Thomas S. Monson was a teenager, he was swimming in the Provo River and saw a crowd of vacationers shouting frantically that a member of their party had fallen into the river and was likely to drown in the whirlpools toward which she was being swept. At just that moment, she thrashed her way into Thomas Monson’s view. He swam to her side, took her in tow, and made his way to the bank. He saved her from drowning.
Fill cup 1 with one of the following:
Celestial: Provo River Water
Terrestrial: Tap Water
Telestial: Cookie Dough
Cup 2: Henry B. Eyring
Until the start of World War II President Eyring’s family attended LDS meetings at the branch in New Brunswick, New Jersey, but with the gasoline rationing of the war they received permission to hold meetings in their home, which often only consisted of the Eyring family.
Fill cup 2 with one of the following:
Celestial: Gasoline (Premium)
Terrestrial: Red Bull
Telestial: Sierra Mist
Cup 3: Dieter F. Uchtdorf
As a result of his grandmother’s encounter with an LDS Church member in a soup line, President Uchtdorf’s family joined the LDS Church when he was still young.
Fill cup 3 with one of the following:
Celestial: Homemade Soup
Terrestrial: Campbell’s Soup
Telestial: Chicken Boullion Cubes
Cup 4: Boyd K Packer
From his early years, Elder Packer showed a love of the outdoors and nature. He had a particular fondness for birds. Over the years he has raised many birds, including peacocks, golden pheasants, and pigeons. He is also a gifted painter, and paintings and his carvings of birds have been displayed at the Church History Museum.
Fill cup 4 with one of the following:
Celestial: Raw Eggs of Exotic Birds
Terrestrial: Regular Eggs From Your Fridge
Cup 5: L. Tom Perry
He is a huge fan of the Boston Red Sox and threw out the first pitch at a Red Sox game on May 8, 2004.
Fill cup 5 with one of the following:
Cup 6: Russell M. Nelson
As a boy, Russell Nelson had many interests, but in college he decided to study medicine. By the time he received his degree in June 1945, he was already well into his first year of medical school, and he completed the four-year course in three years. In August 1947, at the age of 22, he was “a full-fledged M.D.,” having graduated with highest honors.
Fill cup 6 with one of the following:
Terrestrial: All of the Expired Medications in Your Medicine Cabinet
Cup 7: Dallin H. Oaks
Elder Oaks served in the Utah Supreme Court. He preferred this post to any other office in government. “I can’t think of anything in public life I’d rather do than be an appellate judge,” he said.
Fill cup 7 with one of the following:
Terrestrial: Burrito Supreme from Taco Bell
Telestial: Law School Student Loans
Cup 8: M. Russell Ballard
During the October 1980 general conference, Elder Ballard invited Church members who had an inactive or nonmember friend to commit to help that person come to the light of the gospel. He said, “I want to help you keep the commitment you’ve just made. I invite you to write to me when your time has come for some additional help. Send me the name of the person you seek to rescue, and I’ll write a letter of encouragement to him.” Elder Ballard wrote more than 600 personal letters to people who needed help in gaining a testimony.
Fill cup 8 with one of the following:
Terrestrial: Envelope Glue
Telestial: Carpal Tunnel
Cup 9: Richard G. Scott
In 1955, Elder Scott completed the equivalent of a doctorate in nuclear engineering at the Oak Ridge School of Reactor Technology in Tennessee. (Because of the classified nature of the work, a university degree couldn’t be given.) He also helped in the development of the first commercial, land-based nuclear power plant.
Fill cup 9 with one of the following:
Terrestrial: 9-Volt Batteries
Telestial: Mountain Dew
Cup 10: Robert D. Hales
Elder Hales graduated from the University of Utah in 1954 with a degree in communications and business and went into active duty in the United States Air Force, stationed in Miami. Elder Hales served as a jet fighter pilot for four years. (On a side note, check out this photo of a younger Elder Hales.)
Fill cup 10 with one of the following:
Celestial: Jet Fuel
Terrestrial: Vince Vaughn’s Youth
Cup 11: Jeffery R. Holland
Elder Holland’s brother, Dennis, remembers that he was not surprised by the call to Apostleship. “All Jeff ever wanted to do was teach the gospel to students in a classroom,” he said. “I was always sure that the Lord had the same goal in mind for him, but that the size of the classroom and the number of students were on a much grander scale than he was envisioning.”
Fill cup 11 with one of the following:
Celestial: Pencil Shavings
Terrestrial: Elmer’s Glue
Telestial: Flop Sweat
Cup 12: David A Bednar
In 1997 David A. Bednar was appointed president of Ricks College in Rexburg, Idaho. At that time it was the largest private junior college in the United States, with 8,500 students.
Fill cup 12 with one of the following:
Celestial: Gavin’s Mess Ice Cream from G’s Dairy
Terrestrial: Real Idaho Potatoes
Telestial: Funeral Potatoes
Cup 13: Quentin L. Cook
Quentin Cook was born on September 8, 1940, in the Cache Valley city Logan, Utah, to J. Vernon and Bernice Kimball Cook.
Fill cup 13 with one of the following:
Celestial: Cache Valley Cheese
Terrestrial: Grocery Store Cheese
Telestial: Cheez Whiz
Cup 14: D. Todd Christofferson
Elder Christofferson attended Duke University. When he completed his schooling in 1972, he was hired as a law clerk to federal judge John J. Sirica, who would soon preside at the Watergate trials and proceedings well-known in U.S. history.
Fill cup 14 with one of the following:
Celestial: Green Jello
Terrestrial: Watergate Salad
Cup 15: Neil L. Anderson
Elder Anderson was five when his parents, Lyle and Kathryn Andersen, moved their family to a dairy farm in Pocatello, Idaho. On the farm he learned the principle of hard work. “I milked a lot of cows and moved a lot of irrigation pipe,” he said. “I can remember that on Christmas morning before we opened our presents, we had cows to milk. Looking back, I realize how valuable it was to learn that part of life is just hard work.”
Fill cup 15 with one of the following:
Celestial: Whole Milk
Terrestrial: Chocolate Milk
Telestial: Skim Milk
Set up the cups like this:
HOW TO PLAY
Divide into two teams. Each team stands at an end of the table, behind their set of cups.
As you watch conference, listen for the key words printed on the ping pong balls. If you hear one of the words, try to throw that ping pong ball into the opposing team’s cup that corresponds with the speaker. (If the speaker is not included, all of the cups are fair game!)
At the end of each talk, each team has to ingest the contents of the cups that contain ping pong balls.
HOW TO WIN
We all know competition is of the devil, so everyone wins!
ADDITIONAL RULES FOR ADVANCED PLAY
If a woman prays, everyone must immediately eat homemade cinnamon rolls. If a woman does not pray, everyone must immediately drink 3 shots of vanilla extract.
If Alex Boyé is spotted in the choir, all women must immediately swoon.
If Oxyview glasses are spotted, all players over the age of 40 must immediately go outside and take 10 deep breaths of fresh air.
If it is announced that women are to be ordained to the Priesthood, everyone must immediately shoot the television with guns.